Friday, February 19, 2010

alasan kali ini........



howdy to all,

it's been an ages juga i tidak blogging due REASON of my condition, bizies ever, travelling, visiting my sayang serta kesulitan yg tidak dpt di elakkan... huhu, welkam back drew!

so let makin' some noise guys...lol. topic kali ini berkait with beberapa alasan dan just a mind rambling of wut happen to me recently :

bottom line, excuses dpt menyelesaikan byk masalah, tapi masalah tetap ada krn adanya alasan.......im i right??

anyway, let us not confuse an excuse for a reason. an excuse is a ploy to divert attention from ourselves & the reason. for example, my excuse for failing the maritime test wuz bcoz the teacher didn't explain well enough, & I didn't even know there wuz going to be a test, LOL. but the reason I failed the test wuz bcoz I wuz not prepared, not paying attention & did not seek additional assistance.

unfortunate but true, excuses seem to hv bcome a pastime. we create excuses for everything. with excuses we do not have to be accountable. with excuses we do not have to be responsible. with excuses we can hide. that is true right?
i wonder wut would happen if excuses were no longer acceptable?

individually, we could become better people. our intelligence could increase & our actions would be deliberate & thoughtful. we could evolve.

if we stop making excuses, we will be forced to accept the reality of our failures. we will have no choice but to allow the world to see our shortcomings. i do not believe we are prepared for that.

it is through fear that we make excuses. our society has become "experts in training" when it comes to the excuse making process. we will even, as a collective whole, make excuses for our behaviors, policies & actions, or lack thereof for that matter. as a society, we could concentrate on our failures. we can ensure the basic needs of a human being are available. we can learn to expand our understanding of other cultures & regions.

as human beings, we could meet the needs of our environment, rather than making our environment meet our needs. however, we are bound by excuses. one leading to the next whenever there is question, if the excuse is not good enough we search for a better one. we are addicted to excuses. we find ourselves making them when it is not even necessary. when there is absolutely no purpose for it, we will continue to make excuses.

well, we need excuses. we need them to make sense of the senseless, find sanity in the insane & a resemblance of order in chaos. Our excuses are the walls of stone that we construct. they are our silent shields, our perfect protection.



Friday, January 15, 2010

damai engkau disana,






it's been 1yr today. al-fatihah....
i miss u very much, how i wish to be longer with u....







Friday, January 8, 2010

tgif




hanyalah random thot di pagi hari di kala hujan sdang renyai-renyai di ibukota,

even wen u think there's nottin to miss out on...there's always something, if u look closely, i can actually understand now wat it means....life at this point makes me think about dat! any moment is so precious.....but sometimes we forget, we bury ourselves deep into dat PIT called work...let's face it - there r very few of us dat actually hv a true pleasure & passion for wat they do at work! & even those dat do....are they truly happy??? konfius...

ermmm well, i hope dat all's well dat end well...
rezeki tuhan beri, tugas yg di galas adalah tanggungjawab yg perlu dijalankan...


like my "rakan" dat has an incredible passion for her career & has sacrificed every free minute, holiday, birthday...time with people she loves in order to get things done at work ...to go ''above and beyond'' as they say in some places... at da end of da day...if u ask her ''are u happy?''....wat she'd say to me was...


HER!
''NOOOOO! but wen im not in work i dont know wat to do with myself...i feel lost...i try to socialize...but i never do...i hv meaningless one nite stands dat leave me feeling empty da next day. & maybe once every 2 months catching up with frens...as if we lived in different parts of da country. i do not know how to relax & enjoy myself. i can't stand being at home alone. dats why i prefer to work!''


ironically, anybody dat wud meet my fren wud envy her success & da goals dat she reached professionally. still spiritually she feels lost...she has not managed to blend success with a personal life. it's probably one of da hardest things to do...i wudn't know...as i always put my emosi dulu...& i hate it! but i guess dats wat makes me -


ME!
it's also hard for most of us to enjoy life & cherish wat we hv, realizing one day it can be gone in a second...i learned all about dat last January losing someone very dear to me! the shock's effects r on going...& it's affected every aspect of my personality...always thot i was da strong one....well i've been proved otherwise...im kindda my rakan too cuma i dont wan to admit i was same as her...nanti ckp tak serupa bikin pula, sgt maluuuu....kaver diri sendiri, LOL...


and how about LOVE? If in love - we shud love with a passion, completely, intensely...sounds like big cheesy words...but if u dont, is dat really LOVE??? or shud u just let dat go? it's probably best to let something like dat go, something dat doesn't make ur heart jump, dat doesn't make u smile wen u think of dat person, dat doesn't make u long for dat person...& so on...u get me right??...and being honest..to urself...therefore to those close to u..Yes sometimes we may hurt someone we care about by being honest....but in da long run we're doing them a favour! it can only make them stronger & give us a backbone! and isn't it so true dat sometimes we r unhappy but we keep quiet....thinking dat through da ''magic'' of silence, thots will go away - but they never do!

what u run away from, always comes back to u!
sometimes i run away from thinking about things...but today i decided im going to allow these thots in...and spread them in this so-called random, journal...blog apasaja lah u wanna call it u name it...


doubt anybody will read this but if u do - Thank u for ur patience,,,...!! winky-winky =P



Thursday, January 7, 2010

yadayadayada






nadine : hye beb, what is ur resolution for this year...

me : argghhh, malu laah mahu kata..

nadine : errmmm, tell me laah...

me : mahu kurus spt beyonce..

nadine : erkkk....talk to da hand babe....grrr....







Friday, January 1, 2010

2010


assalammualaikum & hi to all frens/viewers,


here are my wishes for u..,
H ours of happy times with friends & family
A bundant time for relaxation
P rosperity
P lenty of love when u need it the most
Y outhful excitement at lifes simple pleasures
N ights of restful slumber (u know - dont' worry be happy)
E verything u need
W ishing u love & light
Y ears & years of good health
E njoyment & mirth
A angels to watch over u
R embrances of a happy years!
goodbye 2009,
welcome 2010.....